What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is square and grey? A grey square.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many baby's does it to paint a wall red? It depends how many you throw.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A white man went to the basketball court to play basketball and was confronted by a group of black men. They kindly invited the white man to play basketball with them and they had a nice day

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

thumb_up thumb_down +20

yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

thumb_up thumb_down +20

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops