what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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