What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

This isn't funny.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

Q: what's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon A: well the first noticable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...