Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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Knock Knock Dude there is no door

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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A Muslim man walks away from a populated area leaving his briefcase behind. After a few minutes he returns because he forgot his briefcase.

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Then that means that, I thought I was working with you? No wonder things did not work out, no wonder jerks like Jonas "the wizard" got inside my team, he was recommended by this "Axel Knight"

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What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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Black guy something something. Anti-racist punchline.

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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