what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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MAKE

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Poop

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

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I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops