Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

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I had friends on the Death Star.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

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What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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the economy.

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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poop.

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Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops