Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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ejaculation JLR

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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Why did I write this joke Because I'm board as hell

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Women's Professional _________

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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if there is a circle of fat people and you throw a cookie in the middle of the circle. It will be the best game of hungry hungry hippos you will ever see.

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A: What are the nine most terrifying words in the English dictionary? B: What are they? A: I'm from the government and i'm here to help

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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