Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

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Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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