Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

Robin, get in the batmobile

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

What did one duck say to the other duck? Quack.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? Who cares?

How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...