What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

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A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

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a chinese man pays the full price

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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1 black man on the moon = problem 10 black people on the moon = problems Whole black population on the moon = problem solved

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

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What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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a black guy walks into a black bar

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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