What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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How High is a Chinese man

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A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

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The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops