What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

Yo mama so old, she might die soon

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

what did the computer say to the tv? computers are not living there for they cannot talk

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

Connor is homo

"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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