Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

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Knock knock. Whose There? Megan Megan Who? Your Wife...

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

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Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

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Girl fight: Teachers take them to dq Boy fight: Lunch and recess in the library.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

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What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

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roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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