What did the man say to his doctor?

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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What did the racist say to the other racist? Hey how was yesterday's clan meeting?

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops