Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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what's worse than pie? alot of things.

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Knock knock Whos there? The Gestapo

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

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What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

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Q. Why did the black man not get on the boat A. Because he gets seasick

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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Q: whats white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you A:a fridge

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

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What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

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A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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