what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

bangers and mash?

Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

I fantasize about having sex with a moose

What is worse than tripping over a stone, and falling face first into a dog shit, Not much..

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...