Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

What is the difference between John and John Nothing

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Why did the teenage boy touch himself at night? Because he was shot in the stomach by his drunken father and was trying in vain to stop the bleeding.

Two People runs into a bar. They were thirsty.

Rebecca Black sings a song.

What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

Knock Knock Who's there Doctor Doctor Who

How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

What is red and can fly? An elephant. I lied about being red. And I also lied about the flying part.

Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

There's a pile of dead babies with one live baby on the bottem eating it's way out.

What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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