A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

Where's the best place to gather black people to roleplay as prison victims for a documentary? Prison or the Graveyard.

Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Just me

What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

A man walks into a bar. He has a beer and then goes home.

What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

boobs.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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