What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

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A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

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Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

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What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

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Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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