Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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