What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you through them.

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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