Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

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Doctor Doctor! I think i'm epileptic! I'm not the Doctor, I'm the receptionist. You're a hypochondriac, now wait in the Que, like everybody else Mrs. Davis.

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Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

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Life

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What's a word that describes someone annoying, black, starts with an N and ends with a R? Nagger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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