Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

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A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

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What's up with airplane food? Well I am a big fan of peanuts, so nothing

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

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A.do i have alzheimer's? B.yes A.do i have alzheimer's?

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

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There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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