Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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What is the mexican dream? To jump the border

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Did nims chinnie? Fins.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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Error 37.

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what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Stop procrastinating.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops