Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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Why was the bully in detention? He punched a fellow classmate.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

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A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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