Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

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Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ?

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being sober in a bar fight

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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women's rights

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Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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Why are women always wrong? Well, depending on the factors of IQ of said women, location and date, said time period of always can be deemed in every circumstance as incorrect to say the least, and derogatory. These days said derogatory actions are punishable by law.

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Koalas mum is a slut

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What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

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You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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