How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

Justin Beiber's Talent.

There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

have safe sex

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...