Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Knock knock come in.

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you know what is so funny hillary clinton!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The bench is an inanimate object incapable of thought

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why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

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What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

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Winter

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was John Elway.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

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Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

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A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops