roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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Buzi vagy!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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