60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What the person say to the other Person? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between ice cream and babies? I don't stick babies in my freezer...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap until there parents come home.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Man in Balcony: You're telling it wrong!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worser than dieing? Living-being tortured while at it too

thumb_up thumb_down -29

knowone loved me why???????????????????????? because they were so damm ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

emma: mat has a quick reaction time

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Abbie has head so far up her arse, it just LOOKS like it's coming out her neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

GOODJESUSLORDALMIGHTY dis boy myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i can't even................ fhrejhklgfjgtedlfcgrbh http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=231&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=6-GniQ6ct-j0HM:&imgrefurl=http://katiespilling.blogspot.com/&docid=6oY2cEt2vFEq0M&imgurl=http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7nKXEePj87o/T5dBnSfhaBI/AAAAAAAAAHw/RNSE68GzbjU/s1600/Harry%252BStyles%252Bboy%252Bband%252BOne%252BDirection%252Barrives%252B1Tg3l2FYklYl.jpg&w=396&h=594&ei=2Y7HT6jnL4e69QSK2oW5Dw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=244&vpy=12&dur=543&hovh=160&hovw=106&tx=72&ty=122&sig=110416686013590693091&page=18&tbnh=160&tbnw=106&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:231,i:105

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Your mamas so poor she cant even afford to support a family

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops