Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

What happened to the soccer player when he got kicked in the leg..... He cried on the ground for hours even though there is padding there

Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

whats it called when you see a ton of white people running down a hill.... an avalanch whats it called when you see a ton of black people running down a hill.....a mud slide whats it called when you see a ton of mexicans running down a hill............ a jail break

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

My Boyfriend

Waffles ate my grandma

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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