What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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what did the girl get with her blueberry waffles? blue waffles.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

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what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

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Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

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what is worst than 1 bee stings two bee stings what is worst than two bee stings holocaust what is worse than three bee stings getting raped by a giant scorpion

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what do you say to a black guy on steroids? B!tch please

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

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Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

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What was that pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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