Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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Miscarriages.

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Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

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2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

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Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

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Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

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What do you get when you mix a baby and chemical waste? A bad smoothie.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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Women's rights.

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What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

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Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu? A new breed of dog.

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A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops