Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

Andrew's a bald wankstain.

a person who will soon die of beeties

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

I'm hungry.

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

what's funnier than hell? heaven

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

a horse walks into a blender ow

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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