Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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woman..parallel parking

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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Q: Why didn't the little boy get his bike for christmas? A: He died from cancer

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is black.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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What did the little boy get from his visit to Penn State? Raped.

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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Nickelback.

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Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

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What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

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Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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