Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

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How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

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What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

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What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

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He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dog? Niether did she

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

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Whats cooler than cool? Ice Cold.

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A: We're eating you for breakfast today. B: Thank you, I'll have my arm.

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a horse nibbled a baby

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Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

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Poop swing

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like most people my age. im 27

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the love boat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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