So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Tell her something that doesn't make any sense at all.

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Alzheimer who? Knock knock.

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you lose.

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But then it wouldn't be an anti joke ya bellendo

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What did the kid say before he died Nothing he was terminally ill

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This is not a joke or is it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What's 9+10? 19

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Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

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HI MY NAME IS DOUG

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why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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what did one black man say to the other black man? hello

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You tell him to do so.

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Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

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why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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A bear walks into a bakerey. He aks for a loaf of bread. The bakers asks: "White or brown?" The bear answers: "It doesn't matter, I'm on the motorcycle".

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Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

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How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

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Queens Park rangers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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