u jelly?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt.,

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Jacob Edwards has friends

thumb_up thumb_down +17

roses are red, bitches are blue close your damn legs and use a condom too.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a mexican driving a plane? Well.. nothing because you can't drive plane's but if a Mexican man was able to FLY a plane, he would be a pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

knock knock who's there no one

thumb_up thumb_down +15

i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the man leave the restaurant? because he was done with his meal

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops