How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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EVERYBODY THUMB THIS JOKE DOWN

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Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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