One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because they're stupid

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Whats funny about black people getting shot by whites We can steal our bikes back now

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

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Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

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What's the most offensive joke you've ever heard? EVENTS: The Black Plague The 2004 Indian Ocean Earthquake and Tsunami The Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre Space Shuttle Columbia The Boston Bombing The Enron Scandal The Great Depression Hurricane Katrina The Iraq War Krakatoa Mt. Vesuvius September 11 2001 The sinking of the Titanic World War I and II PEOPLE: Adolf Hitler Al Capone Attila the Hun Ariel Castro Blackbeard Caligula Charles Manson Ed Gein Elizabeth Bathory Idi Amin Ivan the Terrible Jeffery Dahmer Josef Fritzl Josef Mengele Joseph Stalin Kim Il-sung The Ku Klux Klan Nero Osama bin Laden Pol Pot Saddam Hussein Mao Zedong The Taliban Torquemada Vlad the Impaler DISEASES: AIDS Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis Bubonic Plague Cholera Chronic Diarrhea Cystic Fibrosis Dysentery Ebola Virus Gonorrhea Herpes Leprosy Mad Cow Malaria Necrotizing Fasciitis Polio Rabies Scurvy Swine Flu Smallpox MISCELLANEOUS: Alcoholism Anorexia Nervosa and eating disorders Arson Bestiality Cannibalism Capital punishment Castration Child abuse Colonoscopies Coprophilia/phagia Drug abuse/addiction Electric torture The gassing of cats and dogs that have been abandoned Genocide Human sacrifice Identity theft Losing one's favorite childhood toy Mustard gas Necrophilia Neo-Nazism One's grandmother dying Pedophilia Racism Rape Religious intolerance Stillborn babies Suicide Walking on broken glass Working on weekends

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? I don't know but it's not the little girl.

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poopoo

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

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Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

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Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

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Why did the black person cross the road? Because the street light turned green

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How are a pizza and a jew similar? They both are people aside from the pizza.

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whats worse than having your sextape leaked to the media? not being a kardashian when it happens.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a cannibal.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

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What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

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whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

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Ju... Just why?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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