A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

A Cow Walk's Into A Bar And Say's Drink Please The Bartender Is Then Sent To A Mental Hospital For Talking To A Cow.

tight butthole 4 lyfe.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

i'm funny

what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

What did your last slave die of? Terminal Cancer

a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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