How many dead babies can you fit in a mini? It is variable according to the size of each baby.

How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

What did little jimmy get for Christmas? A box containing the malevolent soul of a 10,000 year-old demon determined to torment his cat.

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Why did the blond fail her math test? Because she got all the questions wrong.

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

What killed the name cool? Coolio

What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

A man walks into a bar. He recieves a concussion and dies of internal bleeding 3 hours later.

Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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