Men don't cum twice easily. That's why Jesus hasn't been around for awhile.

Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

Your mom is fat

What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

What is different between a pile of dead infants and a red ferrari? Being the victim of a mass murder.

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One of them I like to eat, and the other one is a watermelon.

What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

Whats the difference between a raisin and a old lady? One is alive, i think.

A women president

A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

Knock Knock Yes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...