What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

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what do you call a black man in prison? justice.

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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s e m e n

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Roses are red, My watch is gold now get on your knees and do as your told

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guys cmon dont make fun about abbie make fun of josh brown WHAT A NOOB

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whats red and and smells like blue paint red paint

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Colby is gay.... thats it

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

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Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

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Roses are red violets are blue come on love show me you boobs/by kw

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Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

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What do you call a black man that has sex with women against their will? A rapist. The fact that he is black does not pertain to this situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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