I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two men walk into a bar. The bar was being robbed. They were both shot in the confusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats hard, its not what you think a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what happened to the black guy after he turned off the light? he probably wanted to save energy, so he moved to a different room with natural sunlight as a light resource.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A guy has cancer. He dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops