ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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knock, knock! who`s there? it`s me ! who me? yes!

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What's worse than banning guns? Very few things

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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Who is a knob? ross d

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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Why did the jew die Really...

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Q- Who is the life of the party? A- hannah schane

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A man made a sandwich.

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obama leadership

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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