what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

What happened when the homosexual man came out of the closet? He was congratulated for winning the hide and seek contest.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

Why did the black surgeon get fired? The hospital was low on funds due to the economic crisis, and had to let a few employees go.

Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

Q: how do you make a baby blow bubbles? A: hold it under water, or as an alternative you could hold it under its twin sisters blood.

Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The white man comes from European descent and the black man comes from an African descent. This leads to the difference in their skin color.

A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

Yes!

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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