Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Jason Connor.

what said the girl when the roof collapsed over her nothing she died

What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

Why? Whats wrong?

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

bitches be crafty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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