why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

hey bill!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Civil Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I added ICE to WKD it was WICKED

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

milly, milly, milly, cat

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did the Jew his German neighbor? Every morning the Jew says hello and the German replys hello

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Polite say "Hey you, get out of that tree."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops