A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

i wonder who made this website? a human

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

Where did Adolf go as a vacation after the war? Hell

Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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