Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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What has no eyes no arms no legs and the lack of a brain? You for liking this joke

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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why was the postman sad? because ran over a small child with his truck

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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