Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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